Marc’s Lessons on Disappointment from Three Recent Events [Podcast]

Episode #133 – Marc Miller shares his reflections on how he has changed his attitudes in the second half of life, especially, most recently.

Description:

In this episode, Marc explains how he — but not his website — got a mention in the New York Times, how he was glad to see family members after a long separation but was not glad to be acting out old roles, and how a negative Amazon review helped him reflect on the direction of the next edition of Repurpose Your Career.

Key Takeaways:

[1:27] Marc welcomes you to Episode 133 of the Repurpose Your Career podcast. Career Pivot is the sponsor of this podcast; CareerPivot.com is one of the very few websites dedicated to those of us in the second half of life and our careers. Check out the blog and the other resources delivered to you, free of charge.

[1:56] If you are enjoying this podcast, please share it with other like-minded souls. Subscribe on CareerPivot.com, iTunes, or any of the other apps that supply podcasts. Share it on social media or just tell your neighbors, and colleagues. The more people Marc reaches, the more people he can help.

[2:15] Marc has released three chapters of the next edition of Repurpose Your Career to the Repurpose Your Career review team. A fourth chapter will be released by the time this episode airs. Sign up to be part of the review team at CareerPivot.com/RYCTeam.

[2:36] You will receive new chapters as they become available. Marc is looking for honest feedback and would love to get an honest review on Amazon.com after the book is released.

[2:47] Marc’s plan is to release the book in late-September and do both a virtual and a real book tour. He will be in Austin, the NYC Area, and D.C. during the months of September and October. Marc would love to meet his readers and listeners.

[3:05] Reach out to Marc at Podcasts@CareerPivot.com if you’d be willing to give him some advice on venues or groups who would be interested in hosting an event.

[3:15] Marc had planned to read a chapter of the next edition of Repurpose Your Career but decided to delay that a week so he could record this special episode.

[3:27] This week, Marc talks about what he has learned in the previous couple of months from three different events he experienced. Marc hopes you will learn from this.

Now on to the podcast…

[3:43] Marc welcomes you to the Repurpose Your Career podcast. When Marc woke up on the day he is recording this, he thought of three events over the last eight weeks that have shown him how much he has changed in his attitude and behavior.

[4:18] Event 1. Marc was approached by Mark Miller who was writing an article for the New York Times on people who have had their retirement plans disrupted by being laid off. Marc gave Mark a couple of names from his Career Pivot Online Membership Community. You can learn about the community at CareerPivot.com/Community.

[5:07] Mark selected Cleo Parker. Cleo was written up in the New York Times article, titled “Why Working Till Whenever Is a Risky Retirement Strategy.” Marc was really happy to see in the article from May 16 that Cleo got a lot of visibility including a photo of Cleo with her dogs in Livonia Michigan.

[5:47] Cleo had expected to keep her job as a marketing analyst in the automotive industry well into her 60s but at 62 is on the job hunt instead. Her plans blew up in 2008 with the whole automotive industry crashing. Cleo was one of the early members of the Career Pivot Online Membership Community.

[6:16] Over the last 10 years, Cleo bounced from job to job, mostly by contract. She has turned her life-long love of dogs into a business. As Cleo has written, what was really exciting was that the author, Mark Miller, included a link to her Dog Marketing Blog.

[6:51] Cleo was pretty uncomfortable for being the poster child for the unemployed of our [Boomer] generation. This is similar to what Marc heard from Elizabeth White, who wrote the book 55, Underemployed, and Faking Normal: Your Guide to a Better Life. Learn more about Elizabeth White in CareerPivot.com/episode-109.

[7:12] Out of this article, Cleo has gotten a decent consulting gig of 20 to 30 hours.

[7:33] Marc was pretty excited about the article. When Mark asked Marc how he wanted to describe him, he wrote that Marc Miller was a career consultant based out of Austin, Texas. Marc didn’t ask to include the link to his website. In the past, Marc would have really beaten himself up over that. This time, he said, “Oh, well … That’s fine.”

[8:01] Marc has noticed that he is not as bothered by his mistakes anymore. A website link in the New York Times would be a very big deal for search engine optimization. He was thrilled that this is playing out for Cleo.

[8:30] Event 2. When the article published on May 16, Marc sent an email to his brother and to his own son about being quoted in an article in the New York Times. His brother replied and invited Marc to his son’s wedding. Marc and his family have been estranged. [10:06] Marc and Mrs. Miller attended the wedding. Marc wants his sister-in-law, who listens to the Repurpose Your Career podcast to know they had a great time and it was an interesting experience. It was nice to see all the family, but New Jersey is not where Marc and Mrs. Miller want to be.

[11:43] As much as Marc’s brother’s family are very wonderful people, Marc doesn’t want to go back to the United States all that much.

[11:56] Marc grew up very learning-disabled. When he went to college, he graduated from Northwestern’s Engineering School in three-and-a-half years, never taking an English course. When Marc graduated from high school, he could barely read.

[12:17] Like many Boomers, Marc became an ‘actor.’ He went to work for IBM and played roles in his jobs and changed himself to fit those roles. He made very good money but wore himself out and became someone he was not.

[12:47] When Marc was with his brother’s family, he went back and forth from being his normal introverted self to being someone talking way too much at the dinner table. How Marc behaved at times at the wedding is not who Marc is. It is a learned behavior. The learned behaviors Marc used in his career have been emotionally damaging to himself.

[13:52] It’s only now that Marc is learning that he doesn’t have to behave that way. He has choices. He thoroughly enjoyed himself and he is glad he went and he will not be repeating the trip frequently. Marc will go back for his 40th high school reunion, in October. He hopes not to slip into his old behaviors.

[14:44] Event 3. When the Millers came back, Marc went back to his routines. He asked a few people to write reviews for his book. One person wrote a very, very negative review, which Marc shares here.

[15:15] The review is titled, “Title misleading.” It turns out the reviewer assumed the book was about starting a business. The reviewer gave a synopsis, which Marc agrees with, but the reviewer was really looking for a different kind of book.

[16:00] Marc’s response on reading it was, “Wow!” In the past, he would have beaten himself up over this review.

[16:09] Marc is looking at refocusing the next edition of the book he is working on with his co-author Susan Lahey right now. The key piece to remember is that we are living in a time where things are changing rapidly. The rules for careers are changing rapidly. Healthcare in the U.S. is a huge problem for the Millers, which is why they are expats.

[17:19] It is really hard to get anyone to write a review on Amazon, either good or bad. Most people simply will not do it. Marc read the review and saw that it fits in with where he is headed with this podcast and the website. In the second half of life, the rules are being rewritten. For a lot of us Boomers, this is really, really uncomfortable.

[18:07] Marc sees the old guard in Washington trying to maintain the way things have been and it’s not working. The younger generation taking over are not like us who are over 60. See the three-part series “The Career Pivot Multi-generational Workplace Workshop” in Episode 111, Episode 112, and Episode 113.

[18:42] This next edition will be more about how things have changed. Your life and career — which will last into our 80s — will look very different than it did 20 years ago. Work in your 70s and 80s will probably not be full-time employment. It may be multiple part-time jobs and freelancing.

[19:36] That will be a big shakeup for many folks — not being an employee but possibly being self-employed.

[19:46] Marc has reflected from these three events how much he has changed and how much his mindset has changed. Two years ago, Marc would not have believed he would be happily living in Mexico, and his wife would be incredibly happy in Mexico.

[20:21] In spite of being well-paid, and being a good saver, Marc has always worried about money. Marc doesn’t worry about money, anymore. He is about to make a significant investment in the Career Pivot website. He wouldn’t have done that five years ago.

[21:34] When negative things come in, like the three events Marc talked about, none of it bothers him anymore. He can make mistakes and move on. That is a huge shift for Marc.

[22:01] Marc has built his world the way he wants it to be now, which is not how he was raised. They have gotten rid of pretty much everything they owned. Next year they plan to sell their car in the U.S. and go carless for a while. They make decisions based on their ideas, not on what society tells them to do. Marc’s roles are in mainly in the past.

[22:54] The next edition of the book is meant to be more aspirational and get you to understand what is happening, what you need to do, and to get you to think and reflect.

[23:09] Some people have asked Marc for generalized roadmaps to remake yourself. The answer is, he can’t give them that because we are all so different. Marc has done about 400 Career Pivot evaluations and he can tell you that people are really different. Many people cannot separate themselves from the actors they became in their careers.

[23:56] This is the second time Marc recorded this episode. The first time, he went into way too much detail. Marc hopes you will see some of yourself in this episode.

[24:40] Marc hopes you enjoyed this episode. A solo episode requires a lot of editing! Show notes can be found at CareerPivot.com/episode-133 with links to the New York Times article and Cleo’s Dog Marketing Blog. In the near future, you will hear about others in the Career Pivot Online Membership Community.

[25:10] The Career Pivot Membership Community website has become a valuable resource for about 50 members who are participating in the Beta phase of this project. Marc is recruiting new members for the next cohort.

[25:21] If you are interested in the endeavor and would like to be put on the waiting list, please go to CareerPivot.com/Community. When you sign up you’ll receive information about the community as it evolves.

[25:34] Those who are in these initial cohorts set the direction. This is a paid membership community with group coaching and special content. More importantly, it’s a community where you can seek help. Please go to CareerPivot.com/Community to learn more. They are starting a group for bloggers, writers, authors, and publishers.
[26:07] Marc invites you to connect with him on LinkedIn.com/in/mrmiller. Just include in the connection request that you listen to this podcast. You can look for Career Pivot on Facebook, LinkedIn, or @CareerPivot on Twitter.

[26:24] Please come back next week, when Marc will read the next pre-release chapter from the next edition of Repurpose Your Career. This chapter is called “Building on Weak Ties.”

[26:35] Marc thanks you for listening to the Repurpose Your Career podcast.