Are You a Giver, Taker, or Matcher?

Giver, Taker, or Matcher

Are you a giver, taker, or matcher?  Think about it!

This is my second blog post based on the book Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Our Success by Adam Grant.

My last post, Weak Ties versus Strong Ties in your Job Search, came directly from this book.

Givers

Adam Grant wrote:

In the workplace, givers are a relatively rare breed. They tilt reciprocity in the other direction, preferring to give more than they get. Whereas takers tend to be self-focused, evaluating what other people can offer them, givers are other-focused, paying more attention to what other people need from them. These preferences aren’t about money: givers and takers aren’t distinguished by how much they donate to charity or the compensation that they command from their employers. Rather, givers and takers differ in their attitudes and actions toward other people. If you’re a taker, you help others strategically, when the benefits to you outweigh the personal costs. If you’re a giver, you might use a different cost-benefit analysis: you help whenever the benefits to others exceed the personal costs. Alternatively, you might not think about the personal costs at all, helping others without expecting anything in return. If you’re a giver at work, you simply strive to be generous in sharing your time, energy, knowledge, skills, ideas, and connections with other people who can benefit from them.

Hmm…do you know some givers?

Takers

Adam Grant wrote:

Takers have a distinctive signature: they like to get more than they give. They tilt reciprocity in their own favor, putting their own interests ahead of others’ needs. Takers believe that the world is a competitive, dog-eat-dog place. They feel that to succeed, they need to be better than others. To prove their competence, they self-promote and make sure they get plenty of credit for their efforts. Garden-variety takers aren’t cruel or cutthroat; they’re just cautious and self-protective.

Matchers

Adam Grant wrote:

We become matchers, striving to preserve an equal balance of giving and getting. Matchers operate on the principle of fairness: when they help others, they protect themselves by seeking reciprocity. If you’re matcher, you believe in tit for tat, and your relationships are governed by even exchanges.

Matchers are the most common in our workplace. If I help you, you will help me. If you help me, I will help you. Tit for tat.

The lines between these styles are not hard and fast. You have probably worked with all three.

Networking and Givers, Takers, or Matchers

One of the easiest places to spot differences is at a networking event.

Takers are those who will readily go from person to person handing out their business cards and asking for yours. You get a LinkedIn connection request that evening, even though you barely talked with them. For them, it is a numbers game.

The differences between Givers and Matchers can be subtle. They are the ones who engage in the art of conversation. They want to learn more about you. A giver will usually end the conversation with the question, “How can I help you?”

Think about the people you work with. What reciprocity model do they use?

Are you a giver, taker, or matcher?

Marc Miller  

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